Fridge

I've had a lot of letters asking what it takes to be a great cook. I don't have a clue, but thankfully I'm blessed with fine kitchen skills.

It's very important to be resourceful, so here's a recipe using only the contents of my fridge:

1 x half jar of curry sauce
1 x bar of butter
1 x bar of cheese
7 x rolls of film

Remove the foil from the butter, and boil the butter until melted. Add the photographic films, and place the gold foil from the butter in the microwave, and heat until microwave sparks and makes a large bang. Pour the melted butter into empty jars and freeze for six weeks. Pour the curry sauce into a bowl, and eat with a large wooden spoon. Place the cheese back in the fridge.

NB. Try adding salt, for some extra taste.